Sean Adair
Sara Bear if only I had the courage to try to grab you and just hold you and keep you from falling. All the memories you gave me will always remain in my heart. I never thought I could ever love someone the way I loved you and I still question that. You called me from Sterling Heights a few nights before this happened and I’m so sad I didn’t follow through and come to you. God brought you into my life many years back then brought you back to me again and at that moment I realized we had something we’ve never had with anyone else. I think of that time everyday you knocking on my door me just blown away you came in and low and behold you didn’t leave up until we allowed our demons to break us down. If only things were different in our lives right now we’d have been together 11 yrs and raising kids lol Lauren and Tyler were heart broken when they learned as I’m sure Annalise’s is devastated they’ve missed her and always wonder how she is and if you were ok it broke my heart to tell them. So many thoughts running through my mind the biggest is the regret I feel for the things that tore us apart. Looking back I wish we never bought that deli and Ice cream parlor and we never moved into that house in Madison heights and that you never had the accident so that those demons didn’t have something to take from you. That I could have protected you from the misery of other people who would even let you walk any other path but a safe protected and stable one. I blame someone after us but it’ doesn’t matter I’ve spent many nights dreaming how to hurt him for even letting you slip one time but your safe now you’re with your momma and I know you’re always here so many times I hear you it’s tough to understand. I’m just so grateful that at least we were able to talk and allow me to hear that laughter once more and seeing you at Home Depot God work’s in many ways and I know god allowed that one last time for a reason. I love you Sara you will always be the greatest gift in a lifetime of growth. I so don’t want to let go knowing this is really it we always found a way not to completely lose one another and now 1000% I lost an angel in my world ironic that the night we went to Guns n Rosé’s in 2012 you looked so beautiful in your dress and seeing that image in my head to hearing they were coming again this year and it would have been fitting to have gone this time together again I guess I’ll just play Estranged and close my eyes and just let the memories roll. I love you Bear I’ll always have you the real you the person only so many of us REALLY knew and understood. So much turmoil and pain and shame not the people that we so much hated being but the people we always said we really were Peace and love forever angel love you Sean
